These guys are waiting for a natural beauty. They are from a special tribe of caterpillars which specialises in being organic jewellery for local beauties who have a special occasion they need to look pretty for. They descended like this in my path as they could tell from a distance that I don’t wear make up, however, when I got close they said I was too much of a slovenly filthy bucket in my grease stained jogging bottoms to waste their time with me. (I’ve since bought an apron in anticipation of encountering them again.) As such, these caterpillars are probably still just hanging about, waiting for a local lovely. So if you are one, I commend thee to high tail it down to the North Downs Way, just outside of Old Wives Lees. Once the caterpillars spy you, they will turn from being a path pendant into some kind of
I am excited to say that 10,000 Delights, Vol. 1: A Very Incomplete Guide to the North Downs Way is now published and available to buy from Amazon (all regions). This volume comprises all the North Downs Way stories I have written so far, and even though you can, of course, read them for free on this site, I hope you will consider buying the book to support my creative endeavours. As the title suggests, I do intend to keep on compiling the stories thematically into oversized ‘zines. I will likely release Vol. 2 later this year. It’s more expensive than I hoped (£14.99) but that’s because I chose the ‘premium colour’ option so the photos wouldn’t look rubbish. Despite Amazon’s claim to give writers 60% royalties, they get to that figure by some jiggery pokery (in my opinion as a bookkeeper of several decades standing!) and so I get £3.37
It has been a little over a year since I started my writing walking project and I am taking a hiatus for a little while. I want to compile a ‘zine (or two?) from what I have written thus far and don’t have the time to make that and write new stories, alas. The first ‘zine I have planned is called A Very Incomplete Guide to the North Downs Way which will feature all the stories I found on my walks along that long distance national trail. I am not sure how I will get these printed yet, whether I’ll use some print on demand service or if I will just stock them myself, but if you would like to support and buy a copy of the ‘zine, please get in touch and let me know. I want to do full colour, but that may make them prohibitively expensive. I will
As you can see, this rock contains the sunset. Apparently, if you are willing to stand there long enough, it might even become the sunrise. But I’m an impatient sort, so for me, it was only ever the sunset. A nice one though, don’t you agree? I was on a journey from one there to another along the North Downs Way when I found it. After about five minutes of a captivated stare (and the occasional cautious caress), I felt my corporeal existence waning. My body seemed to melt away and then, the next thing I knew, I was on a small boat on that sea, sailing towards that giant black cloud on the horizon. I realised that I was dying, but at the time, I didn’t seem to mind that at all. As I sailed, all manner of strange beasties jumped out of the sea and over the bow of
Jack is an intergalactic traveller who comes to earth for one reason only: to snatch humans and take them back to his home world to be operated on. I’m not sure what the name of his planet is, and if he is part of an intergalactic federated empire or just from one particularly nefarious planet. I don’t know and frankly I don’t care. All I know is that he is likely lizardoid. Anyway, Jack. The reason Jack comes and steals humans to be operated on is because Abigail brings them back and plants them in high powered and influential positions: politicians, big tech, big pharma, celebrities, etc.. After Jack takes the person from earth, they go through an intergalactic wormhole and end up in some advanced operating facility on Jack’s home world. The human then gets half their brain replaced with an alien brain. At first, Jack and his evil kin