This reportage goes out to all the lovers in the world, united and aspiring, one and all. Behold the beauty of the Rose Tree. The Rose Tree can be found in Coles Copse, near Effingham Forest, in the Surrey Hills. It has been a site of pilgrimage for the denizens of north Surrey since at least 1967. History buffs will be familiar with that year as the ‘Summer of Love’, wherein north Surrey residents undertook their own restrained and demur version of free love in solidarity with the citizens of San Francisco. Rupert and Tarquin first discovered the power of the Rose Tree. Rupert was a soppy sort with short back and sides, and despite his boarding school background and emotionless parental environment, he had managed to cultivate a soft heart and romantic dream-life. Thus, when he met Tarquin, all wild haired and unique in his stripy blazer and monkey boots,
These are The Three Teasels, they’re anxious for your song request. Individually they’re called Fiona, Bottombubs, and Nibs, but most people just refer to them in the collective. In the background is Frederico the Oak, who was once hit by some lightning and from whom The Three Teasels draw their power. The Tree Teasels absolutely love to sing. In particular, they like to perform love songs; they’re keen to understand human romance, since it’s mostly absent from the plant world. I say mostly, but of course you will expect me to whip out some exception from the knowledge of whoever the fuck it is that dictates these stories to me. (It’s sunflowers, just in case you were wondering; the exception I mean, not the dictator.) Anyway, what The Three Teasels love the most about love songs is the wide variety. They feel learning and truly feeling the array of love songs