The Launch Pad
Close up of a log and some bark which has four defined, irregularly shaped pads covered in a light green lichen. In the foreground is some moss. In the background is a river with a small waterfall, and blurry woods to the left and right.
I have been reliably informed that this site is called the Launch Pad. The moss in the foreground serves as a kind of deep-pile-shag-rug-in-waiting, and the light green, clam-shaped pedal-keys which overlook the river are where the action happens. If you want to spectate, the Launch Pad’s location is on the little river as you approach Frensham Great Pond from the west. You can’t miss it, such is the shimmering delight of the residual fairy and pixie dust which covers the area.
It’s called the Launch Pad because, every full moon, it’s the site of a great inter-species diving and dance competition. As it was dreamed up by fairies, anyone can join, as the fairies will shrink you down to the appropriate size. When I went, a trio of frogs did an outstanding tap routine and then leapt into the air, jumping from back to back, somersaulting, before enacting the most perfect synchronous dive into the stream. It was genuinely awe-inspiring and mesmerising. It’s unlikely that I’ll ever witness such grace and finesse again, especially if I continue looking in mirrors.
What’s cool is that the pedal-keys actually make sounds as if they are the keys of an enchanted piano. So the music accompanying the frog’s shuffle-ball-changes and whatnot was actually made by the steps of their routine. The complexity of this blows my mind: for not only do the contestants need to consider the visual aspect of their enchanted spectacle, but the audible one too. Sure, a cramp roll followed by a flap might look right at any particular juncture in the performance, but will it sound right too? The mind boggles at how they figure this out. Needless to say, it’s too complicated for me to bother having a go. I’m content to just tell you about it.
The good news is that it is a monthly competition which occurs on each full moon, so if you fancy having a go, the next one is on 22nd June. Please note that you can’t do it with your cat or hamster or dog, as it’s single-species-team-only. You will also need to put on your best outfit, as no raggedy pants or dirty shoes will do. Also, regardless of headdress, you must incorporate a top hat as part of it. Finally, there is no need to book in advance, you can just rock up when you’re ready and join the proceedings. The fairies will always accommodate a sincere performer, as they are able to stretch time with a certain enchantment.
There is, however, one exception to that: sometimes the lizards need to use the Launch Pad as part of a photoshoot. On certain nights, generally only in the summertime, they use the Launch Pad to stretch out and lounge in their sexy pose, as they get photographed for the National Geographic. I’ll be honest, I questioned this, as I have never seen anything like that in the magazine. I strongly suspect that they have been conned, but they were quite adamant that it’s a regular feature and who am I to argue with a bunch of lizards doing the sexy pose? Anyway, they said you can watch, but you can’t join in, so you’ll have to come back another full moon to do your routine.
So there you have it. Another wonderful fact of nature just waiting for you to go out and encounter. There’s so much enchantment out there, should you choose to find it. Luckily for the lazy bones of you, I am your faithful reporter of the natural world, and have dedicated my life to giving you clear directions on how to locate the treasure that exists around us. All you have to do is get up, go outside, and walk until you find it.